Mother Pelican
A Journal of Solidarity and Sustainability

Vol. 14, No. 2, February 2018
Luis T. Gutiérrez, Editor
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Reflections and Chronicles From The End of Time:
In Search for Singularity

Carlos Cuellar Brown

This article was originally published as Chapter 11 of
In Search of Singularity, 20 January 2017

In a singularity, you are one with the whole, able to pull yourself together into infinite density and maximum entanglement.

The marvelous self-organizing system that is a newborn baby has no sense of separation. An oceanic feeling compels the baby to interpret everything as togetherness, all the events out there appear as extensions of the I reflecting back to “is-not-ness.” The human child at this stage is a sophisticated formidable whirlwind of pure potentiality that has not formed a personality and has no way of discerning differences in the experience. Gradually and by increasing discoveries of self-awareness, such as a baby recognizing its face off the reflecting mirror, the child begins to identify self as separate. Between 3-5 years of age, we largely lose our sense of wholeness. From then on, domestication schools us to play back the orthodox story that culture holds true. We become self-absorbed in defining who we are and understanding the world around us with its infinite compartments.

After the early separation from the greater I am, most human beings are left longing for something that went missing. With a lack of internal instructions, we feel empty and crave meaning; we spend our lives lost and searching for a way back to this place of “is-not-ness.”

Throughout history, this need has led humanity to follow the enlightened ones. In hope for answers, the spiritual marketplace has flourished with such solutions to the mystery of life. They will go to great lengths to lead you on their path to salvation. Some of these churches create blasphemous montages, imposing judging gods with guilt trips of sin and condemnation. A good number of us fall short of the unfulfilled promises of institutionalized faith. Inquisitive people are not satisfied with the dogmatic fairy stories downloaded into their minds. Yet it’s easy to get lost in the searching because seeking for answers in the many layers of reality out there is a road with no return unless you are willing to wait till eternity.

Instead, it’s a matter of opening our hearts to universal entrainment as an introspective exercise. Finding inward wholeness is elusive and deceitful. Perhaps it’s because we keep looking at a myriad of concave mirrors in an empty space. Scientists have coined the term vacuum to represent vast amounts of space with nothing in it. The atom is almost all vacuum, 99.999% empty space. Recent theories hypothesize that rather than being empty the vacuum contains infinite amounts of energy. Perhaps matter comes into existence when the energy of the vacuum concentrates, focuses on a point, forms a singularity. Like a vortex, a mini black hole emerges, all energy is condensed and does not escape. It’s like the point of stillness in the eye of the cyclone. Everything there becomes frozen. We might assume that what induces matter to coalesce is the resulting fluctuation of the vacuum itself; subatomic forces and mini black holes dancing and danced.

In a singularity, you are one with the whole, able to pull yourself together into infinite density and maximum entanglement. At this point there is no thinking; instead, there is a universal know how that vibrates at a master frequency. Opening your heart to this possibility may allow incredible things. Our linear thinking and representational schemes put blindfolds on our field vision. Thoughts and symbols can only by true virtue, point in the direction of what is. If you were outside on a starry night pointing at a rising full moon, your finger pointing at the horizon would be the thought process and the moon the thing in itself. Your pointing can never be the object being pointed at. Back to when we were all babies, our moments of self-awareness flashed and embezzled us with a sense of separation. Individuals became enslaved by patterns of behavior misrepresented as our personality. This is why relying on our persona, the sum accumulation of thoughts and beliefs is potentially eluding.

We fail to understand that our thoughts, certainly useful for practical living, can only aspire to point at the essence of matter. To access the available singularity, back to wholeness, you must suspend thinking.

Instead, we rather assume reality through the lens of cultural history, in a world that is split on opinions, blurred by the microscopic peephole through which we partially see. We miss out on vast details and unavailable characteristics of reality. This myopic understanding gets us derailed in seeking out there for answers. The oceanic feeling we long is still with you from within. Gateways to this infinite reservoir happen through insight and creativity. Insight and creativity play a more important role than facts. If it were not for “aha” moments, scientists would have nothing to verify. Because of the measurement paradox, verifications become half-baked truths that we contain to be fact. Yet science has been revolutionized over and over by innovation and insight.

However elusive, the explanation for insight belongs in the domain of the mysterious. The realm of imagination, innovation, infinite love, compassion, altered states and gut feelings reveal the face of the “is-not-ness.” Have you ever felt that way? There, you realize that you are not the binding characters of your personality pretending to be a mini dancer in the cosmos, you are not the dancer at all, you are being danced by cosmic forces. Under this premise, free will becomes fictional empowerment. The newly born baby is full of intelligence calibrating its carbon shell, not aware of the “I-am-ness.”

In a singularity, there is an explosion of oceanic feelings like childlike experiences full of freshness and newness. In a singularity, the laws of physics fall apart. At this moment we are swallowed by the funnel of a mini black hole. From inside the black hole, the general theory of relativity predicts that singularity is concealed behind the event horizons. A conduit to superintelligence emerges accessing the inner workings of the lucid dream. In lucid dreaming you can levitate, miraculously, heal and pass your hands through the fabric of nature. In the “is-not-ness” that you already are, we are not individual droplets of water but the “ocean-ness.”


Carlos Cuellar Brown is a New York City media artist and essayist who has written on new media, social theory and metaphysics. His essays have been posted online by Opendemocracy, The Global Dispatches, The Pelican Web, Kosmos Journal, and STARDRIVE.

In 2013 his essay “Intermedial Being” was published by A Journal of Performance and Art PAJ #106 MIT Press Journals. In 2015 Mr. Brown was nominated for the TWOTY awards out of the Netherlands for his essay “Blueprint for Change”. He has been a regular columnist for Second Sight Magazine and Fullinsight.

His book, In Search of Singularity: Reflections and Chronicles from the End of Time, published 29 January 2017, is a series of reflections on the current cultural evolution from competition to cooperation, from patriarchy to reciprocity between humanity and the human habitat.

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"Prosperity tries the souls of even the wise;
how then should men of depraved character
make a moderate use of victory?"

Gaius Sallustius Crispus (86-35 BCE)


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